Why Jesus Didn’t Give Everyone the Same Access—and What That Means for Us

I recently listened to a sermon that got me thinking—What am I letting into my heart through my ears? If you’re like me, social media can be a goldmine for recipes, outfit ideas, and clever hacks, but it also has a dark side. I’ve found myself listening to arguments, gossip, and negativity more times than I care to admit.

It reminded me of a trip I once took with sixteen women. Now, imagine trying to coordinate meals, schedules, and personalities with that many ladies—it was like herding cats in high heels! Thankfully, there were no full-blown catfights, but let’s just say it wasn’t always smooth sailing.

One night, as we debated where and when to eat (for what felt like the hundredth time), I started thinking about Jesus and His disciples. I love to imagine their time together as peaceful and encouraging—everyone calm, aligned, and full of joy. But the truth is, they were human. And just like us, they had their moments.

Even Jesus Dealt with Disagreements

Scripture doesn’t sugarcoat it.

Luke 22:24 (NIV)
²⁴ A dispute also arose among them as to which of them was considered the greatest.

Mark 9:34 (NIV)
³⁴ But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest.

James 3:16 (NIV)
¹⁶ For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.

It’s a good reminder that even those closest to Jesus had egos, insecurities, and conflict. Yet Jesus loved them deeply and handpicked each one to walk with Him. But here’s the part that stood out to me the most…

Jesus Loved Everyone, But Not Everyone Had the Same Access

Jesus poured into all twelve disciples, but there were three—Peter, James, and John—who stood out. These three were His inner circle. They were with Him in some of His most intimate, miraculous, and vulnerable moments.

Mark 9:2-3 (NIV)
² And after six days Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, ³ and his clothes became radiant, intensely white, as no one on earth could bleach them.

Luke 8:51-55 (NIV)
⁵¹ And when he came to the house, he allowed no one to enter with him, except Peter and John and James, and the father and mother of the child. ⁵² And all were weeping and mourning for her, but he said, “Do not weep, for she is not dead but sleeping.” ⁵³ And they laughed at him, knowing that she was dead. ⁵⁴ But taking her by the hand he called, saying, “Child, arise.” ⁵⁵ And her spirit returned, and she got up at once. And he directed that something should be given her to eat.

Matthew 26:36-38 (NIV)
³⁶ Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to his disciples, “Sit here, while I go over there and pray.” ³⁷ And taking with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, he began to be sorrowful and troubled. ³⁸ Then he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death; remain here, and watch with me.”

Jesus didn’t limit access out of favoritism. He knew their hearts. He knew who He could trust with more and more revelation, more responsibility, more of himself. That hit me hard.

What Does That Mean for Us?

Jesus modeled something powerful. We’re called to love everyone, but that doesn’t mean we hand everyone equal access to our time, thoughts, and heart.

It’s okay to set boundaries. It’s okay to guard your peace.

• Got a friend who always brings drama? Love them, but limit their access to your emotions.
• Know someone who shares every secret they hear? Be kind, but don’t hand them your heart on a silver platter.
• Feeling guilted into saying “yes” when your spirit says “no”? Jesus didn’t say yes to everyone either.

Even Jesus needed quiet moments and trusted companions. So do we.

Check Your Inner Circle

We all need people in our lives who will pray for us, lift us up, and fight for us in the spiritual battles we don’t even see. Your circle doesn’t have to be big. It just needs to be faithful.

And here’s a tough question I had to ask myself: If Jesus had to choose three from among my friend group, would I be one of them?

Am I trustworthy? Loyal? Passionate about following Him?

Maybe you’re not sure. Maybe you feel like an outsider or someone who’s made too many mistakes. The good news? Jesus is always ready to invite you in. He wants you close.

Want to Be in Jesus’ Inner Circle? Start Here

You don’t have to be perfect. Peter denied Him. James and John argued about being first. But they followed Him with their whole hearts, and He drew them near.

Jesus is extending that same invitation to you right now. He wants to walk with you, lead you, and show you what it means to live in the fullness of His love.

To God Goes The Glory!

Have A Blessed Day!

End with a Prayer

Lord Jesus, I want to be close to You. I believe You are the Son of God, and that You died and rose again to save me. Please forgive me for the times I’ve walked away or tried to do life on my own. I open my heart to You today. Teach me to follow You, to love like You, and to trust You more every day. Thank You for never giving up on me. Amen.